When Jim walked out it was a blessing because he was a toxic factor in my life. I have had enough of his lying, using me, sneaking around, cheating, manipulating, boasting and narcissistic attitude.
If you choose to ignore my words of wisdom that is your choice, but everything I tell you is true and I have dozens of people who can confirm these facts as well as documentation, recordings, pictures and witnesses. Someone tried to warn me when I first met Jim that getting involved with him was a huge mistake. Sadly, I chose to ignore that sound advice and I regret it to this day.
Jim has a pattern he has followed most of his life. He can be very charming and extremely manipulative to get what he wants. He is a con man and has convinced at least three women to allow him to move in with them because he does not have the financial means to live on his own. He will tell you about “the condo” in Satellite Beach, which was in fact owned by his parents. The other houses he lived in were owned by the women he duped into believing he cared about them. He will brag about all the improvements he made to these homes. In my case everything he did was paid for by me and he provided some of the labor. His justification was he was doing it to improve my house. I did not ask him to do any of the projects.
He has a unique way of twisting the truth. He has made statements like “we” are buying a boat, meaning his boss was buying a boat which Jim would have use of. He told friends of mine that he “got” my vehicle for me, which in fact meant he may have negotiated, but the trade-in, down payment and monthly payments were made by me. (Be aware he may try to convince you to purchase a new vehicle, one that he wants and that he will help you “get” it. It would have to be a model that would suit his high status symbol. He does like the finer things in life). Another similar statement was he “got” the house for Karen (the victim before me). Again he may have found it, but she bought it because he did not have the credit, down payment or income to purchase it. The same goes for the Harley motorcycle she purchased for him. The house in Ballard park is another lie. It was never owned by him. He will tell you about all the money he is going to have or going to make. That farce is his believing he will get a sizable inheritance when his parents pass away. His parents, are acutely aware that he can not handle money in a responsible manner. He has left a trail of unpaid bills, including money he owes me which I never expect to recover. He does like to flash his cash though, but he keeps his financial matters a secret. I found him on numerous occasions going through my records but quickly learned to hide my finances from his prying eyes.
Jim is secretive about most everything. He was constantly checking my phone messages and mail. He would listen to my phone conversations, but when he would make a call he would disappear so that he could talk in private. He would hide his mail or destroy it and refuse to discuss his financial situation. He was not upfront with me about where he was going or what he was doing. He claims to be honest, but he was never completely honest with me, nor was he honest with his parents.
His schemes will include doing favors and buying you things He will be helpful to your friends and family, but only to impress you and because he is expecting something in return. He has left behind multiple unfinished projects, but is quick to brag how much he does for everyone. I suspect he will recycle the jewelry he purchased for me (or pawn it) and then stole back when he left. If you receive a sapphire or diamond tennis bracelet, those belonged to me. It’s just his way of making you believe he really cares and trying to impress everyone. It’s all about the illusion, buying drinks for the gang like a high roller, wearing expensive clothes, hats, jewelry, vehicles, etc. He may tell you about the Mercedes he owned. I was convinced by him to finance the purchase of that status symbol (my bad for falling for that lie) because he was unable to qualify. He said he was going to refinance that in his name which of course never happened.
He has a strong desire to be in charge of everything, activities, decisions, sex. He is a control freak. He will decide when, where and how things are done, including sex. He makes the rules, but is above following any one else’s rules or preferences. He will Not be told what to do. He will never admit he was wrong, never say he’s sorry (unless he is backed into a corner and needs a way out) and will rarely say thank you.
I strongly suggest you research the Brevard Clerk of Court summary of citations, violations and felonies which date back to 1989. I encourage you to review those twenty two (22) cases. Two of those citations are for domestic abuse which I pray does not happen to you. It’s a wonder that he has not hurt or killed himself or someone else with his reckless behavior. He violates the terms of his probation daily with his excessive drinking. He is known to frequent Players Billiards Club and Mugs Pub. He has possession of firearms, continues to drive without a license and has used drugs.
To enhance his “generous” image he gave away items owned by me to his friends without my permission, ie things such as furniture, vacuum, washer, dryer, dog crate.
I would also like to warn you about allowing Jim to use your vehicle. He convinced his boss, to use his truck and took my vehicle without my knowledge or permission. I have pictures of that occurring. If he is caught driving your vehicle, you risk it being impounded. I finally resorted to hiding my keys. Since he does not have a driver’s license I became his personal, unpaid Uber driver.
You will hear Jim frequently state what a hard working guy he is. But the fact that he has to be a self promoter only enhances the fact that he is a narcissist. He displays the typical behavior. He exaggerates and embellishes his skills and accomplishments. His self perception of being unique, “bad ass”, superior, and associated with high-status people is found in the comments and bragging he does. He throws around lots of names of people he knows, which leads him to believe and expect preferential treatment from other people, entitlement and obedience. He creates illusions of superiority, status and advantages by association with important people.
His personality disorder has a long term pattern of abnormal behavior characterized by exaggerated feelings of self-importance, excessive need for admiration and lack of empathy. He spends a lot of time thinking about, fixating on and fantasizing about achieving power or success. He often takes advantage and exploits the people around him to achieve personal gain.
He is the ultimate con artist. He has a pompous and arrogant demeanor. I lost track of the number of times he stated that he was not a liar or a thief. The fact is that he is that and more – a cheater, master manipulator and a felon.
He will monopolize and interrupt conversations, refuses to consider suggestions or opinions made by others and reacts with outbursts of rage, defiance or revenge. He wants constant praise, validation and admiration. If that does not happen he can turn hostile or aggressive. On numerous occasions he has threatened to have his buddies from the Warlock motorcycle club get even.
Please do not let him trick you into believing what he does is for your benefit, because trust me it’s all about him. I’m sure that his version of our breakup was that I threw him out and wouldn’t allow him to retrieve his possessions. Once again another lie and a plot to gain sympathy. He claimed I disrespected his honesty. His final words were “I’m done, I’m out of here” He claimed I was making him move out. What he did not know was that I recorded the entire conversation so there can be no dispute about what happened. I confronted him about his lying and cheating and he had no plausible explanation. His knee jerk reaction was to run, however he had no plan in place. He quickly found his next victim and convinced her to let him move in within several weeks.
I hope and pray that he does not take advantage of you or hurt you. Do not let him demean, belittle or intimidate you if he doesn’t get what he wants. He is very deceptive, dishonest, dominating, selfish, vain, and vindictive. He is always looking for the next best thing, never satisfied with what he has.
Wishing you all the best. Be safe.