Ellen Westburg — Lumberton, New Jersey

Ellen Westburg will blow and bang anyone who pays for her drinks. Can’t do a motel room? She’ll take you back to her place and bend over backwards in the poolhouse for you. A little extra if her children are home while her husband works a double. When the old favorite in the Cracker Barrel kitchen doesn’t fill her mouth, Ellen phones her long time fix, adorably named Smitty, because of how smitten she is with his large, traumatizing wallet. If you can’t buy her drinks or name brand ski gear, she don’t want nothing to do with your tiny ‘uncompromising’ self. While the family of childeren she openly regrets having and the husband who owns her in financial lockdown know of the one affair, they have no idea her infidelities spread to every rest stop along the turnpike, every parking lot of a bar, and ever deep pocketed patron that isn’t her husband.

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